today, my dearest monroe, i am overwhelmed. i am so immensely overwhelmed by my love for you & for the ever-growing testimony that your heavenly father knows you, knows me & put you & i together for so many beautiful reasons. today, out of the blue, you got very, very ill. i panicked - per usual. and for a split second i questioned my capacity; my tolerance for vomit, my patience for crying, my ability to care for you in the way you need. however, in my moment of weakness, you, my little 17-month old, looked at me with the confidence that i was lacking. you trust me to know what is right, to do what is best for you & to be strong when you cannot be. there is no way for me to communicate to you how heavy yet how enlightening that responsibility is. i feel so honored to be your mother; to be the person who you trust here on earth, while you are away from your heavenly father. rest assured that i will always care for you & do my darnedest to always do what is right by you.